AN INSTRUCTIVE CHILDREN’S English-language nursery rhyme is meant to guard the center of emotions from criticism and insult. “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words shall never hurt me!” We know that this is patently untrue from personal experience. We have all been wounded by words, and we have all been encouraged by words. Words have power. Words convey not just meaning, but relational attitudes of acceptance or rejection, approval or condemnation. Scripture tells us that “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” (Prov. 18:21) Words, once spoken, enter the aether that flows between souls, and become forces that shape relationships and destinies. Words are the keys that open or shut the doors between the parallel universes of self and others. The thoughts of the children’s rhyme reach a hard-earned maturity later in life, with this anecdotal bit of wisdom: “I’m careful of the words I speak; I keep them soft, and sweet. For I never know, from day to day, which ones I’ll have to eat.”
The bible has much to say about both the constructive and the destructive power of words. Proverbial wisdom reflects, “From the fruit of their lips people enjoy good things, but the unfaithful have an appetite for violence. Those who guard their lips preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin.” (Prov. 13:2-3) James also warns, “Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.” (James 3:10). Conversely, James says “Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect, able to keep their whole body in check.” (James 3:2) And Proverbs adds, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.” (Prov. 25:11, ESV) We would do well to consider these things carefully; Jesus tells us, “For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” (Matt. 12:37) Our words have eternal significance.
Jesus is our perfect model of the person who is always in control of his words. The prophet Isaiah, in messianic utterance, says “The Sovereign Lord has given me a well-instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary.” (Isa. 50:4a) In context, it is directly linked to the following: “He wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being instructed.” (Isa. 50:4b) We picture, with Isaiah, the future savior; on a daily basis he awakens to the presence of God as the first conscious thoughts of his day. His soul is instructed, he avidly seeks preparation to speak and respond to others on a moment-by-moment basis. John, who lived in Jesus’ presence, quotes him in this respect. “For I did not speak on my own, but the Father who sent me commanded me to say all that I have spoken. So whatever I say is just what the Father has told me to say.” (John 12:49-50)
Like us, Jesus had to deal with all kinds of people—friends and enemies, poor and rich, powerless and powerful. Unlike us, his words were always perfectly measured and appropriate, as were his actions This was true of him from the first words we hear him speak to the last, and all of them in between. At twelve, his parents return to Jerusalem and find him at the temple. To their query, he responds “‘Didn’t you know I had to be in my Father’s house?’ Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them.” (Luke 2:49-51) At the last, on the cross, to his Father’s unbending will, he says “It is finished.” (John 19:30)
Between these two events he uses words of persuasion that form a band of disciples: “Come, follow me, and I will send you out to fish for people.” (Matt. 4:19); words of rebuke that cast out demons, “Come out of this man, you impure spirit!” (Mark 5:8); words of dispute that challenge authority, “When you have lifted up the Son of Man, then you will know that I am he and that I do nothing on my own but speak just what the Father has taught me.” (John 8:28); and words that deny worldly power and authority, “My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, my servants would fight to prevent my arrest.” (John 18:36) Every word that Jesus utters throughout his earthly life is exactly appropriate to the events that the Father has orchestrated for his own purposes.
God’s ultimate purpose is the restoration of the relationship between mankind and himself—a restoration that renews all of creation, and gives eternal life to each person that has a relationship with the Father through Jesus. In the current creation, that relationship is a unique one. It is a relationship that we perhaps understand best through Peter’s response to Jesus. “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and to know that you are the Holy One of God.” (John 6:68-69)
The same Spirit that instructed Jesus with the will and the words of the Father now speaks to us, and should speak through us. Our words potentially carry the same power of life and death. Let them also be like “apples of gold in settings of silver.” (Prov. 25:11) The Spirit within us shall not harbor the spirit of criticism, but the spirit of love. Jesus’ words remain our guide: “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” (Luke 6:45) May our hearts be full of the spirit of encouragement.
Q. Do my words wound or heal, criticize or care?
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